tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2770038640809565363.post1560178692327834319..comments2023-08-16T02:24:36.169-07:00Comments on PhilAsify 101: Dating In Islam: Why Muslims shouldn't Date and why YOU shouldn't either.Asifhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17763483447275044760noreply@blogger.comBlogger55125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2770038640809565363.post-77038291923343723772020-09-06T10:40:30.171-07:002020-09-06T10:40:30.171-07:00How To Let Go Of Someone You Love<a href="https://boredmojo.com/how-to-let-go-of-someone-you-love/" rel="nofollow">How To Let Go Of Someone You Love</a><br /><br />Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00289210367867289234noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2770038640809565363.post-5267714424165852332017-02-10T04:06:45.305-08:002017-02-10T04:06:45.305-08:00Yes it's a sin. Again we Muslims aren't pe...Yes it's a sin. Again we Muslims aren't perfect. We are built to make mistakes and screw up. We have to try as much as we can to do the right thing. You may think a hug is innocent but in Islam it says to not follow the footsteps of Shaytan. A hug could eventually lead to a kiss, a kiss could lead to clothes coming off and sex eventually. It may not be happening now but it COULD happen and Shaytan definitely wants it to happen and its more likely to happen when you two meet alone. The hadith that Shaytan is there when a man/boy and woman/girl are alone, he's the third party. <br /><br />As a Muslim girl I would advise you not to meet the boy in private. If you have an interest in him, let it be known, don't hide it (parents must know). If you're too young to get married, avoid the relationship. If you are serious and feel you are mature, have a conversation with your parents about it. That may seem scary but it's better than making mistakes down the road and hiding your struggles.<br /><br />Asifhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17763483447275044760noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2770038640809565363.post-84256502039048732842017-02-10T03:58:29.738-08:002017-02-10T03:58:29.738-08:00Sorry for the late reply. Muslims aren't perfe...Sorry for the late reply. Muslims aren't perfect (me included). What I laid out in the article is what should be done but again since we're imperfect, we may not be able to follow it perfectly and that's why we pray to God for guidance, help and forgiveness and try to do the right thing as much as possible.<br /><br />You can pursue the relationship, there's just a right way to go about it. Letting the person know your intentions to get to know her and wanting her as a potential mate/wife (NOT a gf). Asking to meet her parents if possible. Meeting and talking with eachother in safe settings where you wont end up having sex and getting intimate. <br /><br />Easier said than done but as Muslims we have to strive and TRY to do that right thing.Asifhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17763483447275044760noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2770038640809565363.post-61808039496974163992017-02-10T03:53:49.080-08:002017-02-10T03:53:49.080-08:00That's not a practice of the Muslim faith, tha...That's not a practice of the Muslim faith, that is a Muslim man feeling guilty that he is doing something he shouldn't be doing.Asifhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17763483447275044760noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2770038640809565363.post-55960385687575772712017-02-08T20:18:51.024-08:002017-02-08T20:18:51.024-08:00Hi. I am currently dating a boy. I am Muslim and h...Hi. I am currently dating a boy. I am Muslim and he is not. U explained to him I can not do any kissing or sexual things. We just hug. Is that still a sin or not? Could you please help me out because I have been searching for an answer but can't find one or if you could give me your opinion it would mean a lot. Thank you. Lolahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13851657759854945853noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2770038640809565363.post-70943420669271436762017-01-24T05:33:43.895-08:002017-01-24T05:33:43.895-08:00i started dating a Muslim , including having relat...i started dating a Muslim , including having relations. Now he wants to not have relations for at least 90 days so we can get to know each other better. Is this a practice in Muslim faith?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2770038640809565363.post-58423584149831056342017-01-05T20:25:14.446-08:002017-01-05T20:25:14.446-08:00Hey! You got a very nice article. It was really we...Hey! You got a very nice article. It was really well written and very interesting that i couldn't do anything but to keep on reading. i am really inspired and looking forward to stuffs like this. After some effort to figure this dating thing for my self i also came across some useful articles that worth reading. follow the link bellow to explore the best out from it. Donn't thank me; what are friends for? you are my Muslim fellow after all. <br /><br />DATING IN ISLAM (is it Haram or Halal?)<br />https://islamstuffs.wordpress.com/2017/01/06/the-truth-about-dating-in-islam-halal-or-haram/Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2770038640809565363.post-17142913743811216782016-10-18T21:49:21.681-07:002016-10-18T21:49:21.681-07:00Honestly, there is no way to stop this. It all dep...Honestly, there is no way to stop this. It all depends on you and the will that Allah has given you. I am male so I cannot completely relate but I can tell you this. This madness isn't going to stop. I am sorry for being brutally honest but it isn't the truth. One thing you might want to consider doing is telling your school counselors what is happening. My best friend, who is female, has had this problem. She talked to her counselor who thankfully understood and somehow managed to put her in all female classes. It doesn't have to be a counselor, just somebody. I don't know you. You have no idea who I am. As one of my sisters, I care for you I am sure you wouldn't trust me. Do not take to the internet to ask for solutions. Ask, friends, family, whoever you trust. This is all the advice I can give. Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2770038640809565363.post-33936604901216497892016-10-18T21:34:46.333-07:002016-10-18T21:34:46.333-07:00Hi. I read your article and it was very interestin...Hi. I read your article and it was very interesting. But, in today's modern society, it is considered "weird" to ask someone to marry them without actually having an intimate relationship with the person first. And, distancing yourself from the person you "crush on", could make them move away from you too and then you lose them as a friend and a partner. As a Muslim, I am always taught to trust in Allah and that he will guide me. But, I can't deny that I'm worried that if I don't pursue the relationship, I will never find out if she is that special someone. I would love to here your thoughts on what I have said. Please respond ASAP. Thank you in advance.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2770038640809565363.post-83216281387904379582016-09-23T09:20:19.355-07:002016-09-23T09:20:19.355-07:00I don't really understand because Islam is tel...I don't really understand because Islam is telling you that you have to marry a random stranger and spend the rest of your life with them acting akward etc I know that islam is based on intention and fornication is what you are punished for if kissing leads the person to fornication and they think they will do it then they should get married also zina is love and not lust if you love somebody you wouldn't have sex with them before marrige and if you love them and value them you would get to know them first before marrige also you can also say fornication is what you are punished for not kissing or hugging Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2770038640809565363.post-70075723707853555762016-09-11T14:02:23.696-07:002016-09-11T14:02:23.696-07:001 thnk I'm confused about is...islamic pple r ...1 thnk I'm confused about is...islamic pple r so mch effective about life partner and follow that they must not hve any relationship with the opposite sex b4 marriage unless they are willing to stay together for the rest of their life but why does the islamic guy hve so mch wives???if they relly luv(so called true love) their own wife then why should they marry 3/4 wives?????����is that a true love for them??Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2770038640809565363.post-60660122401917433742016-08-29T10:51:09.533-07:002016-08-29T10:51:09.533-07:00I'm a Muslim girl entering highschool and it&#...I'm a Muslim girl entering highschool and it's a whole new world. I don't want to get caught up in the dunia and do the wrong things but it's a bit difficult. <br /><br />You would think that a girl who wears hijab would get a bit more respect and the guys would back off. Wrong. They don't care! No matter how many times i explain to them the reason why I can't date or play around with them like any other normal boy and girl would ,they just dont understand.<br /><br /> The bad thing is that I feel like I'm getting sucked into this madness. In my head I begin to justify and validate some things that I did which I know are wrong. This is a cry out for help!!! What should I do? How do I stop myself from getting caught up into all this craziness?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2770038640809565363.post-35642753900135792312016-08-16T07:56:43.784-07:002016-08-16T07:56:43.784-07:00I am revert. Lately I'm getting frustrated as ...I am revert. Lately I'm getting frustrated as I have found someone but I am in no position to marry. I'm starting to question the big deal regarding just being with someone. I mean, I like someone, they like me we have a connection it seems the whole marriage thing is a bit extreme in terms of that being the only way to be together. It just causes more hassle because of the worry of not being able to support financially at the moment. But I have to stop myself from having a natural instinct towards someone and loving them and being happy just because I can't pay their bills at this point in time. I. Don't. Get. It.<br /><br />I see millions of people who are in long committed relationships who aren't married and who are just living together. Which I'm my mind is questioning the saying " a halal relationship never works" Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2770038640809565363.post-81021611670800349052016-07-22T07:28:49.999-07:002016-07-22T07:28:49.999-07:00Hello. About 2 months ago I got caught by my paren...Hello. About 2 months ago I got caught by my parents with a guy I've been with for around 4 months. I feel really bad about it but at the same time I have strong feelings for him. We're very young and I know what we did was wrong and I try to repent to Allah as much as I can. We got really close. Since we got caught he cut off all communications with me and I know that it's the right thing to do. His mom is a teacher at my school and my mom went to her and they had a talk. I thought my feelings will begin to fade but they're not and they're so strong. I just want your opinion on the matter than you Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2770038640809565363.post-29974614741796890922016-06-27T20:07:48.764-07:002016-06-27T20:07:48.764-07:00Thank you for all of this information! I recently ...Thank you for all of this information! I recently went out to dinner with an old friend of mine that I haven't seen in 10 years. He picked me up at my house paid for dinner, we went to a cafe after and continued to talk and then he took me home and asked if he could see me again and I said yes. After what I would call "our date" he's been pretty distant. Before our date we were texting everyday until then. He is Muslim and Practices this religion as well as his whole family. I am non muslim and just now learning about this religion and I did ask him questions about it in person. I'm just wondering after us going out and getting to know each other, is this him starting to court me? and is it normal for a Muslim man not to follow up or have much contact after getting to know you? He said he had a good time he was glad it went well and wanted to see me again but I find it weird we're not communicating a lot after.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2770038640809565363.post-14328361936297594322016-05-31T00:24:01.036-07:002016-05-31T00:24:01.036-07:00This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2770038640809565363.post-47208762050198966602016-03-05T00:23:00.001-08:002016-03-05T00:23:00.001-08:00Listen to your heart and you'll be fineListen to your heart and you'll be fine <br />Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2770038640809565363.post-13729249385419187012016-03-03T14:10:31.356-08:002016-03-03T14:10:31.356-08:00Brothers and Sisters,
In my country it is good ...Brothers and Sisters, <br /> In my country it is good to go on one or two dates before getting engaged. I would like to go on a date because, how will I know if this is the man I want to spend my life with. I feel as if it is necessary to go on dates because what if he is not your kismet. It would be better to know them first and obtain mutual feelings first before getting engaged and feeling stuck to that person because you can't leave them anymore. I don't think that going on dates just to find out who someone is, is a problem. Rather I think it is a blessing because Allah knows what will happen, but it regards the path we choose to walk down, we have to go find our kismet in a spouse and not just wait around and get proposed by people we don't even know. I am texting this guy that lives very far away (in my country) and I only saw him once during summer on my vacation. A few months ago he added me on facebook and I knew it was him, because that night (in summer) that I saw him I feel in love with him. I didn't know him or his name and he didn't know me or my name. He said that it was funny how Allah sent him here on my profile. Now I'm waiting to see him again, and to see on a dae if he is my kismet. Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2770038640809565363.post-91351299542194471372016-02-13T13:36:37.003-08:002016-02-13T13:36:37.003-08:00Really think someone should have replied to you un...Really think someone should have replied to you under the circumstances and predicament that you state yourself to be in but hey better late than never!, I'm also in a similar position to you, maybe not as bad but similar so... yh text me xx . ahaaha jokes but I strongly recommend getting out there and doing shit, the longer your in front of the t.v especially watching western tv will more than likely make you think more about love and therefore drive your hormones like crazy. I'm a 17 year old muslim growing up in Britain and I find it really hard to steer away from attention I dont always want from girls at my college. I mean yh its great girls calling you fit and cute but the only thing I dont like is this thing at the back of my mind (or heart... not sure) that keeps me away. At times like these I just think about education success and then put love at the end of the list always telling myself that my love will surely last after I have established good financial grounds for myself and my family and then I can look for a long lasting relationship. I'v liked this one girl in my college for about 7 years now and she asked me out once when we were younger and I rejected her because I was scared and my parents distanced me from the notion of dating or love that I had no clue what to do. It's more difficult that most people understand growing up in the UK (in my case) or any western state as a muslim especially muslim teenagers. I swear for some weeks all I can think of is birds and the fit tings at my college. I just have to remember that at the end there is love and if what I think is 'my true love' (the girl I'v liked for 7 years) really loves me then she will wait for me. DAMN I wish I could just start up a successfull business and get pee'd up so I can bring her back home to the folks without a problem :PAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2770038640809565363.post-4744536006861764022016-01-01T00:11:09.276-08:002016-01-01T00:11:09.276-08:00Assalamualaikum ya akhi..im just wondering how is ...Assalamualaikum ya akhi..im just wondering how is your opinion towards my condition.. im living in a country who needs around 10 thousand dollar atleast to get married..it's hard especially for us fresh graduate student with salary just around 1000 per month with tough economic right now to collect that huge amount..im thinking about break up with him but then his father died..i felt so sorry for him and i think ut was a bad idea of leaving him with his situation right now..we never touch each other..my mother know him..but still i felt bad every time going out a date..it fells wrong some how..even though we just going out for lunch..but then we cant get married right now..as his fathers died and he is the eldest one have to take care of his family finance and so on..what should i do actually? Should i just leave him and wait until he's ready financially? Coz it quite hard as he reallt needs me to encourage him and support him at his bad condition right now..i felt guilty and at the same time i felt guilty to Allah too..he knows how i felt right now but he only can said he will marry me about another 2 years..he said that he will respect my decision but still i don't what to do Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2770038640809565363.post-47606883336800332852015-12-02T14:06:13.900-08:002015-12-02T14:06:13.900-08:00I'm 15 and I am muslim and I just met this guy...I'm 15 and I am muslim and I just met this guy and he is really really nice, I have the words "I love you" stuck in my throat everytime I see him but I have to push it down. I want to say something to him but my parents are strictly muslim and wouldn't let me do such a thing, even if I hide it. A lot if muslims at my school date nowadays. One other thing I wanted to ask is if tou can be dating someone but not have any sort of physical contact with them as long as you let them know that, that is not what you are into. Thank you! Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14967271793692809350noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2770038640809565363.post-7258957867109690022015-11-09T12:47:16.146-08:002015-11-09T12:47:16.146-08:00Hi and thanks for reading my blog. Yes you're ...Hi and thanks for reading my blog. Yes you're right, I haven't been active on this blog lately but I do monitor it and God willing I hope to continue blogging soon once things get less hectic for me.<br /><br />You're right (pfffffff) IT IS HARD out there. It's hard out there being a Muslim but the fact of the matter is that we are not immune to society and the problems that come up just because we are Muslim. We have to deal with peer and social pressure, drugs, sex, materialism and all the other problems that exist is this life.<br /><br />I'm not a scholar by any means so take my advice with a grain of salt. You made a good decision to get away from this path you were going on with this person you've been seeing. We must not forget that there are external unseen forces around us that are at work. Shaytan and even our own soul are working to break us down and do things we know aren't right. We are at a constant daily war with ourselves, our wants and desires and against the devils influence.<br /><br />The devil and our desires want us to rationalize (aka "lie to ourselves") that kissing/hugging is harmless, that we aren't sinning, that if the person I am with converts and we get married, the sinning is justified. We have to remind ourselves of both OUR purpose in this life (We're being tested in this life by God and will be judged by our actions and decision making and will be either rewarded or punished for what we have done) and the purpose of Shaytan (To do whatever it takes for us to fall off so badly in sin that we are punished with Hellfire). Once these two things are understood we can put into place an action plan that will be effective in making us meet our goal and making Shaytan fail in his goal.<br /><br />So you were doing right by getting away from the rationale you had. You would also do right by avoiding interactions with this person whom you found yourself developing an intimate relationship with. Potential convert or not, it's a no-no. Avoid interaction, contact whatever. If you want a relationship with a good Muslim man, go through the proper channels, not mingling with a guy hoping he converts. 1) Let your family/friends/community know of your desire to get married and they'll plug you in to potential spouses you can get to know and see compatibility through the halal means. 2) Go to Muslim singles events in your locality and find potential mates that way. 3) Go through a reputable Muslim matchmaking sites like halfourdeen.com. and most of all 4) Pray! Ask God for protection from all of lifes temptations and for God to bring a worthy mate into your life.<br /><br />Hope that helps.Asifhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17763483447275044760noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2770038640809565363.post-28856355291862767232015-11-08T19:27:18.691-08:002015-11-08T19:27:18.691-08:00It seems like you may not be active on this blog a...It seems like you may not be active on this blog anymore but I just wanted to tell you that this helped me. Born and raised in the states, I've always been very conservative. I "blossomed" now in my 20s and started my career. I met the potential convert you mentioned. And I've been trying to justify to myself kissing/hugging is not haram. "Where does it say that in the Quran?!". and he even provided a rational that we will never go as far as zinna and therefore kissing would be ok. I've made a conscious decision to get away from this. I hope the wrong I've done doesn't block a blessing of a righteous and good husband (even though I don't think that's how God works). <br />pffffff. this is hard.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2770038640809565363.post-68314215574927237362015-09-06T04:21:54.050-07:002015-09-06T04:21:54.050-07:00my little cousin is dating and I am extremely worr...my little cousin is dating and I am extremely worried about her. I fear she will not listen to me because i did explain to her a few times (before she starts dating<br />) that this is forbidden and immoral. How do I proceed...should I tell her mother at least...someone please advise me. I am so angry right now.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2770038640809565363.post-91322927265647608632015-06-10T21:00:16.240-07:002015-06-10T21:00:16.240-07:00What about Nika Mut'ah? I know it's popula...What about Nika Mut'ah? I know it's popular among Shiites and Western Muslims (known as Western Islam and sometimes Liberal Islam) What would you say to those people who say that marrying someone just to date them? Do you think a Muslim who rushes into marriage because they want sex or not to be single would have a long lasting marriage without divorce? In other words some one who is not ready for not only marriage but also to be in a relationship shouldn't consider marriage. But that's my opinion. But if they're ok with marrying then divorcing if things don't work out then I guess they could do that. The bad thing is that one pays to get married and pays to get divorced. And then the legal responsibilites of marriage. Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17861302290744410853noreply@blogger.com